Stuff your beauty product commercials are trying to make you believe

> that your entire life, sanity, food, shelter and even mere existence depends on the color of your skin. Beauty cream is almost life-blood

> that you always need a fairer complexion though all your aunties think your the fairest in the family. Yearn for more-that is the mantra

> that your career is at stake until you do something about that poor complexion of yours

> that your family might eventually drift away from you or in worse cases even disown you because

your "far from perfect" complexion disgusts and humiliates them

> that not a single person from the opposite sex is going to do so much as glance in your direction because if you're not fair enough and aiming for fairer, you are basically invisible

> that dark people are losers, less determined, frail and always depressed. Fair skinned people are winners and role models. Perfect, heavenly beings

You don't have to take my word for it. See for yourself:

> dark complexion and self-esteem repel each other

> that the whole world lights up and shines, thanks to that pretty, fair face of yours. Yes. There are rainbows popping out all along the way you go and there is instant sunshine and happiness, everyone is insanely ecstatic; all because of the fact that you are 5 times fairer than you were last week - the week that was full of rain and gloom everywhere you set foot.

Simply put, the world goes around since you chose to use that cream

> that using a great face cream will actually transform your whole persona, your style and just about everything. Your entire wardrobe changes and you undergo metamorphosis from Plain Jane to Glam Diva instantaneously

> that everything a woman in pink clothes keeps jabbering about on TV is the universal truth and you should gape and nod and rush to the cosmetic store

> that the skin is made of as many layers as a facewash claims it can permeate. You should forget all that gibberish about the 3 layers of human skin your biology teacher kept lecturing on

> that for winning anything in life, you need to rely on a tube of vitamin-enriched potion with moisturizing granules and mud as much as you would believe in your ishta devata. Keep your tube of magic in your pooja room for better progress

> that "fairness cream" is too passé  and so you must practice saying "Beauty Benefit cream" to be regarded as cool, sophisticated, dignified and maybe rich


>that with our exaggerated, glaringly implausible, bizarre, over the top and conspicuously photoshopped advertising, we hope to help you understand how our shampoo is going to be genuinely effective and give you demonstrable, natural, gentle care

In short, the message they want to convey through such "imaginative" ads is this:
"Promises apart, don't you just love our ads? We are very proud of them too. And no, our ads are not tall/false claims, they are just representative of our proficiency at creative advertising which we think should help you see how creative we could be in our product features too, but let's not get sidetracked from our cool advertising skills.

 

> that you should blindly believe in a face pack that claims to be fortified with the purest of the pure honey, aloe vera and mud (euphemistically named Multani Mitti), claims to have no harmful chemical content and swears on mother nature that it is 100% herbal and safe because it comes in a glossy pack but you should completely disregard the natural, unadulterated home remedies that your mother prepares for you

> that your face wash/pack/cream contains all of nature's finest fruits and herbs and nuts you'll ever need. All this goodness has been scooped up and crammed up into that tube so that all you need to do is squeeze out the magic and dab it on. Forget about including fruits and nuts in you food. Because you can easily send in all the nutrition to your system by osmosis right through your facial tissues

> that those wrinkles are the most unnatural, abhorrent things to appear on human skin. They are so revolting and absolutely abnormal. In some cases they even tend to become almost paranormal in that they could scare people away from befriending you.

And they're not going to iron themselves out unless you use that specially formulated, dermatologist approved and clinically certified WTH formula or the mineral-enriched HML potion that comes in a teeny weeny vial and costs you a fortune. And don't get them wrong. They sell that stuff in a small container only because it will be easier for you to carry around and flaunt it and try to look important

> that it is not enough if you merely wash you face with a cleanser or soap to remove make-up. In order to be a great woman whom others can look up to, you should invest in a nice and luxurious make-up removal cream. Didn't know such a product exists? Wake up, woman! It's such a cool invention! Its like trying to put out fire with gasoline.

In simpler terms, you must never really let your face breathe without the interference of a bulwark of chemical compounds. So you get to take off your make-up by dabbing more chemicals onto your face.

> that when they make a change in package design and print the words " with our NEW and IMPROVED formula", you must trust them and ignore the fact that their previous ad already boasted it was "the BEST solution for acne".

Never wonder why they would try to become better if they were already the best in the market as per their previous claims

> that if you want to buy a certain brand of face wash or cleanser, in order to reap BEST RESULTS you must also commit yourself to pretty much the entire range of items that is manufactued under that brand name . So whenever you look at that single bottle of shampoo you bought, there is should be an unsettling stir in your mind that gnaws at your heart and berates you for not accompanying the shampoo with the conditioner, hair oil, hair serum, hair gel and spray that were recommended on the pack for the much coveted "best results".
Such a blooper must make you feel terrible.
But please don't get this idea wrong: It's not that the shampoo is not good enough. It's just that it will work to its full potential only when you use it along with all the other items in the same brand's hair care brigade

Hair Care. Try saying it aloud once. Swanky, ain't it?

Anyway, they're basically telling you this: "each single item in our product line suffers from a case of separation anxiety and cannot perform when isolated from it's family. So you must realize what a grave error that would be and go ahead and buy our cleanser, our moisturizer, our toner, our scrub, our astringent, our face pack, our anti-aging cream, our blackhead remover, our acne cream, our dark circle remover, our bleach, our expert treatment cream, our vitamin-enriched cream, our sunscreen lotion, our skin brightening lotion and so on and set up a little showroom kiosk for our brand at your place"

> that when a shampoo sachet gets bigger and has "__% extra!!!" printed across the pack, you must not be too curious and over-reactive and wonder about these things:

1) Does the word 'extra' mean that the level of shampoo the sachet contained before the offer was not enough for a single use?

2) How much shampoo should I actually use to safely wash my hair without drying up and damaging the scalp?

Because they need not worry about advising you on the right quantity and use of shampoo. What is more important is pleasing you with the words:  FREE, EXTRA and OFFER.
Because customer is king. Until she goes bald.